Sunday, 3 April 2011

Farewell..!!

Yesterday was the first time in my life that i attended any real party.It was an awesome feeling to be among such beautiful,confident people,and it made me think about where i stand socially,and what my stutter has taken from me.Although i was'nt willing to attend the party for fear of making a fool of myself,i was persuaded by my classmates,so i reluctantly attended it.

At the beginning i was really nervous about any speaking situation that i might encounter or problems i might face.I thought that everybody there would be watching me and judging my every move and listening to my every word,waiting for me to stutter.But contrary to my thoughts,i was surprised at how everybody smiled at me and said 'hi' to me.That made me less nervous.

I thoroughly enjoyed the farewell party,but at the later stage,i became depressed at seeing all the happy and cheerful people,who were of my age or even younger.Thoughts like "i could've been as happy as them if i didnt stutter",and many others,kept spiralling in my mind and i think that made me enjoy the party lesser and think about the problems in my life.
Overall ,it was a good day, i did something i was scared of doing,and i came out unhurt.And i think that is what a stutterer needs,a high dose of self confidence and self belief,to realize that being a stutterer is no shame and as the famous quotes say "No man is hurt but by himself" and "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent".Both these lines give the same message,that the stutterer must not give importance to the lies that his brain is feeding him,and the torment or ridicule he will face at the hands of his fellows,he should believe in himself and be helpful and kind to himself,cuz god helps those who helps themselves.Anybody can be whatever they want to be,they just have to try,even if it means standing alone.

This experience gave me a hell of a booster ,which i hope i'm gonna ride for the next few days,,until i return back to my old ways...
hope someday i can bid farewell to my stutter....!!